I would like to thank those who were very concerned about me when they read my blog~
THANK YOU~! =) *you know who you guys are*
and also those who spent time listening to me~ i'm really very grateful esp when i'm such a problematic kid! XD
for those who noticed a change in me as in temper wise~ thank you very much for telling me cause it really encourages me to improve! =D
things between me and him are fine again as on that day he forego his mahjong session and came down to talk things out with me *which already implies that mahjong isn't as important as i am*
we hadn't been sitting down talking like that for ages~ though i can see that he was very tired due to morning trainings and rushing down to mahjong without even bathing after he booked out~ we ironed things out and gave 1 month to this relationship if things gets worse~ that night he said that actually he didn't intend to play mahjong but its because of that small lil gian he went and realised it wasn't a good choice in any way~ he was sick and tired but made a bad decision to play overnite mahjong with his horrible condition plus if we didn't quarrel he would have to meet me the next morn without any sleep~ I do admit that I was implusive that nite in making such a decision to say such things or give him such decisions to make~ its because i know him too well~ far too well~ if i hadn't did anything like that, what will happen?
1st - he would be very very very tired and when he goes home he'll hit the sack while I'll be upset and affected by the whole thing the whole night plus the whole morning and afternoon until he wakes up to solve it~
2nd - he will be more sick than the day before plus he had his cough for already a month and havin less sleep means your immune system will be weakened
3rd - even if he were to force himself to meet me in the morn, we will end up quarrelling worse den last nite as he hadn't had sleep at all and he won't be thinking in a logical or sensible manner which will lead to frustration among the both of us and eventually breaking up because of lack of sleep and frustration
4th - he's the kinda guy if you do not give extreme choices he wouldn't be able to make a choice. What do I mean by that? if i told him, choose between apple and orange, he would say either "you choose" or "i dunno". if i told him, choose between apple and orange and if you don't choose either you will be killed, den he might make a choice which he feels is a better one. He's a wooden block and indecisive.
Tink about consequences and consideration for others? at most the mahjong session gets cancelled and postponed to another day? is it a must have on that day? is it 10 months since the last time you guys played? If you asked me to be considerate for others, den did you guys considered my feelings in the first place when you said something like that?
For that one person whom I used to trust in and confide to~I don't condemn you, neither do I loathe you or hate you cause you don't get the whole picture. You have your own reasons to write such an angry post but I don't blame you cause I did in actual fact spoiled your game of mahjong. But I was sad over the fact that those hurtful words came from no one but you. I don't hate you, but I'm disappointed as a good friend. If mahjong is more important than friendships, I guess I'm not a good friend as to me friendships are more important than mahjong. Besides, that night, jianqi made his choice. He chose to agree to the game and chose to left the game. So he has partial responsibility to the unhappy ending of the game too (not that I'm trying to push the blame).
And also, if you have something against me due to my not-so-christian personality and way of doing things, please do not use things like Christians would do what and what. I admit I'm a Christian but i've not learned everything and practiced everything that what Christian's would do. I'm still in the process of learning and changing and growning spiritually. I know what i did do not glorify God but that doesn't mean that I will be like that forever or I'm a crooked Christian. I just became a Christian last Aug. Do you expect God to turn me good over night?
Gambling and Interest/HobbyI like to play mahjong~ yes I do~ but not to gamble~ from $0.10/$0.20 it became $0.20/$0.40 and $0.30/$0.60 half and then $0.30/$0.60? what's next? $0.50/$1? $1/$2? from zhi mo + $0.20 and kang becomes $0.40/$0.80? How much more are you gg to increase the rates? Its never ending I can tell you~ I've a colleague who knew of someone who gambled away his bungalows cause they played in gold bar terms~ they wrote cheques~ threw gold bars in~ so is that wad its gonna be like in the future?
I must admit, I'm a sore loser. Esp when it comes to money. Why? I'm not working full time. I don't save up on usual days. My monthly take home pay is only ard 300? I have to pay for my own expenses. I'm LUCKY that i've got my mum to temporarily help me pay for my sch fees. If I lose 20 every week, i'd be losing almost 1/3 of my pay?
when me and jianqi go play, sometimes i'll win alot, sometimes he'll win, and sometimes both of us will lose. Do you really think i'm super super happy winning when i see him feeling sad? He's not earning much too and he's very thrift. That tens of dollars might mean alot to him? I'm not trying to portray that how pathetic how he is or i am. But I feel that if you really love to play mahjong, do you really have to play at such a high stake?
what's the most I won before? 30plus? 40?
what's the most I lost before? 60plus?
to me~ i feel that mahjong is just a hobby and a game like monopoly i enjoy playing~ If u scared that u'll doze off~ den make it a point that the loser will treat drinks? at least when you guys sit down n drink u'll get 2 talk and bond at the same time? I liked the bonding on the mahjong table as in get to talk and stuff. but as the stakes gets higher and everyone doesn't wan to lose so much, less words are spoken and instead its replaced by silence.
I do love mahjong and I noe its not really possible yet to take it out of my life immed and jianqi's too~ but I don't want to gamble~
I just wan to play~ its that simple~
my bro tell me: to get e wrong idea clearly, whether its right or not is not bound by really there is money or not. what if i gamble lets say sweets? will gambling whatever the items will be, caused you, or your friend to be greedy and gamble. is it a sin or not is bound by the person's intention.
Da First Baked Pasta I've made from scratch! tastes not bad! XD
Da Apology flower my botak head bought for me during my exams period~! it kept me happy during the stressful exam period~
Log Cakes~!!!! XD *shivers*
Biscuits~
Pineappletarts~
Cornflake Cookies (improvised version)~
And more pineapple tarts! XD
A very artistic pic of all my babies~ XD